Get Your American Idols Live Tickets Here!
Hollywood's Largest On-line Gift Store LightingCatalog.com - Shop for Your Home from Your






Cute Baby Contest - Enter for free!


To submit a joke for inclusion on this website, please use the form below. Simply add your name or email address, the joke, and then hit the "SUBMIT" button! Your joke will be added to these pages! Enjoy the website!

Submit Jokes Here!

Confucius Jokes!

Confucius says..."The more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets."
Confucius says..."Nothing is ever accomplished by a reasonable man."
Confucius says..."Enough research will tend to support your theory."
Confucius says..."If an experiment works, something has gone wrong."
Confucius says..."All things being equal, fat people use more soap."
Confucius says..."If you want to make an enemy, do someone a favor."
Confucius says..."If you have to ask, you are not entitled to know."
Confucius says..."Learn to be sincere. Even if you have to fake it."
Confucius says..."The sun goes down just when you need it the most."
Confucius says..."Never underestimate the power of human stupidity."
Confucius says..."That which cannot be taken apart will fall apart."
Confucius says..."Push something hard enough and it will fall over."
Confucius says..."Man who have circumcision lose a bit of foresight."
Confucius says..."Man who stick foot in mouth get athlete's tongue!"
Confucius says..."Efficiency is a highly developed form of laziness."
Confucius says..."Man who kisses girl's behind, gets crack in face."
Confucius says..."The more things change, the more they stay insane."
Confucius says..."People whom make Confucius joke speak bad English."
Confucius says..."Never say "oops" after you have submitted a job."
Confucius says..."Man put in shit-house by wife end up in cat-house."
Confucius says..."All generalizations are false, including this one."
Confucius says..."Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny."
Confucius says..."The best way to realise your dreams is to wake up."
Confucius says..."A boss with no humor is like a job that is no fun."
Confucius says..."If it is worth doing, it is worth doing for money."
Confucius says..."The first time is for love, the next time is $200."
Confucius says..."Nice guys finish last but it is lonely at the top."
Confucius says..."Crowded elevator always smell different to midget."
Confucius says..."Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails."
Confucius says..."He who stick head in open window get pane in neck."
Confucius says..."Woman who slides down banister makes monkey shine."
Confucius says..."Don't bite the hand that has your paycheck in it."
Confucius says..."Never argue with a man who buys ink by the barrel."
Confucius says..."An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance."
Confucius says..."At any level of traffic, any delay is intolerable."
Confucius says..."Old age is always fifteen years older than you are."
Confucius says..."All things being equal, all things are never equal."
Confucius says..."If at first you don't succeed, try something else."
Confucius says..."Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like bananas."
Confucius says..."Man who walk in middle of road get run over by bus."
Confucius says..."Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding bag."
Confucius says..."Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."
Confucius says..."Don't try to have the last word; you might get it."
Confucius says..."The easier it is to do, the harder it is to change."
Confucius says..."Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism."
Confucius says..."Woman who make love in treehouse put ass out on limb.
Confucius says..."A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose."
Confucius says..."People will buy anything that is one-to-a-customer."
Confucius says..."It's always darkest just before the lights go out."
Confucius says..."No matter how much you do, you'll never do enough."
Confucius says..."There is no safety in numbers, or in anything else."
Confucius says..."When they want it bad (in a rush), they get it bad."
Confucius says..."Government expands to absorb revenue and then some."
Confucius says..."Knowledge based on external evidence is unreliable."
Confucius says..."A streaker is someone who is unsuited for his work."

Page 1.2.3.4.5.6.7.8.9.10.11.12.13.14.15.16.17.18.19.20

Try a free sample Romantic Compatibility Reading Try a free sample Women's Wisdom Reading!Free Sample Sexual Soul Mates Reading for twoFree Sample Karma Readingfree sample Romantic Compatibility Reading!Try a free sample Personal Astrology Profile!Try a free sample reading from Astrology.com!Two Week Love Forecast!Free Sample Maya Aztec! Free Sample Chinese Element AnalysisCalifornia Astrology AssociationRetrieve a loverCalifornia Astrology AssociationBrowse Our Astrological ReportsAstrology, Tarot and More!Try a Free Love ReadingTry a Free Psychic ReadingClick for a FREE Psychic Reading from Keen!Click for a FREE Psychic Reading from Keen!Click for a FREE Psychic Reading from Keen!Click for a FREE Psychic Reading from Keen!Free Pyschic ReadingClick for a FREE Psychic Reading from Keen!Click for a FREE Psychic Reading from Keen!Save up to 75% on Fine Jewelry & WatchesGet 20% Off on Health and Beauty Products from AmericaRx.comJewelry Sale at Goldemine.comAlways For Me Plus Size SwimwearName a starTry a free sample Romantic Compatibility Reading Try a free sample Women's Wisdom Reading!Free Sample Sexual Soul Mates Reading for twoWreckingBalm 234x60Free Sample Karma Readingfree sample Romantic Compatibility Reading!Shop skin care products at MakariFree Sample One Week Forecast from Astrology.comTry a free sample Personal Astrology Profile!Milagro Nail Care SystemTry a free sample reading from Astrology.com!Two Week Love Forecast!Ukraine womenFree Sample Maya Aztec! Free Sample Chinese Element AnalysisLatin womenShop skin care products at MakariShop skin care products at MakariShop skin care products at MakariShop skin care products at MakariShop skin care products at MakariBeauty Products and SuppliesSkinCareRx.com (Free Shipping)SkinBotanicaTigi Beauty productsCosmetics Gifts Set up to 30% OffGet Free Skincare Gift - COSME-DE.COMCosmeticmall.com468X60 large bannerEthnicBeautyLink to Bioelements Skin CareFragrancesCosmeticMall.comCosmeticMall.comUltra Hair AwaySkinBotanica.comShave No MoreOn SaleThousands Of FragrancesUHA Permanent Hair Removal SpraySkinStore.com234X60AnimationBannerTALIKA Eyelash Lipocils at USD28.00 Only   a href="http://www.anrdoezrs.net/click-3615965-10679544" target="_top">Get $20 off $125 at SkinStore.Use promo code GET20Skinstore Exclusive ATOPALM MLE Cream and T'Fivve


Send free text messages!
Please enter a cell phone number:

NO Dashes - Example: 7361829726

Please choose your recipient's provider: