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Paris Hilton Jokes!

How does a horny guy spell relief? P-A-R-I-S!
What did Paris Hilton name her pet zebra? Spot!
How does Paris Hilton kill a fish? She drowns it!
How does Paris Hilton kill a worm? She buries it!
What is long and hard for Paris Hilton? 4th Grade!
What is Paris Hilton's favorite rock group? Air Supply!
What does XXX stand for? Paris Hilton co-signing a note!
What is Paris Hilton's idea of safe sex? A padded dash!
How do you change Paris Hilton's mind? Blow in her ear!
What does Paris Hilton make best for dinner? Reservations!
What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Paris Hilton!
How did Paris Hilton die drinking milk? The cow fell on her!
Why does Paris Hilton drive a BMW? Because she can spell it!
Why did Paris Hilton return her new scarf? It was too tight!
What's Paris Hilton's mating call? 'I think I'm drunk!'
What is foreplay for Paris Hilton? Thirty minutes of begging!
How do you change Paris Hilton's mind? Buy her another beer!
Why won't Paris Hilton use vibrators? They chip their teeth!
Why does Paris Hilton drive cars with sunroofs? More leg room!
Why did Paris Hilton sit on a newspaper? So she could lip read!
How does Paris Hilton like her eggs in the morning? Fertilized!
What does Paris Hilton do for foreplay? Remove their underwear!
What do you call a zit on a Paris Hilton's ass? A brain tumor!
What's Paris Hilton's idea of safe sex? Locking the car door!
What is Paris Hilton's favorite nursery rhyme? Hump-me Dump-me!
What do you call Paris Hilton behind a steering wheel? An airbag!
Why does't Paris Hilton eat bananas? She can't find the zipper!
Why does Paris Hilton have TGIF on their shoes? Tits Go In Front!
Why does Paris Hilton wear green lipstick? Because red means stop!
What is the worst thing about sex with Paris Hilton? Bucket seats!
What do you call Paris Hilton lying on the ground? An air mattress!
Why did Paris Hilton drive into the ditch? To turn the blinker off!
How is Paris Hilton like a door knob? Because everybody gets a turn!
How does Paris Hilton high-five? She smacks herself on the forehead!
What would Paris Hilton use for protection during sex? A bus shelter!
What is Paris Hilton's favorite part of a gas station? The Air Pump!
Why did Paris Hilton stop using the pill? Because it kept falling out!
What is Paris Hilton's favorite potato chip? Free-to-lay (Frito-Lay)!
What does Paris Hilton say after sex? Are you boys all in the same band?
Why can't Paris Hilton have an elevator job? She can't learn the route!
How does Paris Hilton turn the light on after sex? Kick open the car door!
How did Paris Hilton break her leg raking leaves? She fell out of the tree!
What does Paris Hilton do after she combs her hair? She pull up their pants!
What do you do when a Paris Hilton throws a pin at you? Run. She has a grenade!
What do you do if Paris throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back!
Why were Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie fired from their "Simple Life" job at a banana company? A. They threw out all of the bent ones.
Officer: Hello there, maam. Could I see your license please? Paris: Jesus! I wish you cops would get it together! You just took away my license yesterday, and now you expect me to show it to you? WTF! Not hot!
Paris walked into a library because she wanted to experience something new. She walks up to the counter and says Can I have a burger and fries? The librarian says, Im sorry, this is a library. So Paris whispers, Can I have a burger and fries?
Paris walked into a library because she wanted to experience something new. She walks up to the counter and says "Can I have a burger and fries?" The librarian says, "I'm sorry, this is a library." So Paris whispers, "Can I have a burger and fries?"
Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie were shopping when Paris suddenly realized she locked her keys in the car. So they went back and Paris got out her tweezers to try to pick the lock. She tried for a couple of minutes and then Nicole gave it a try. Hurry! Paris said. Its starting to rain. And the top is down!
Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie were shopping when Paris suddenly realized she locked her keys in the car. So they went back and Paris got out her tweezers to try to pick the lock. She tried for a couple of minutes and then Nicole gave it a try. "Hurry!" Paris said. "It's starting to rain. And the top is down!"
Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton are driving down the highway in a convertible. Lindsay knows that shes speeding so she asks Paris if there's a cop behind them. The Paris looks behind her and sees a cop and says Oh shit. There is a cop behind us. Lindsay says That sucks. Are his lights on? Paris says Yes, No,Yes, No, Yes, No.

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