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Baseball Jokes!

Yogi Berra Quotes: Shut up and talk.
Yogi Berra Quotes: Pair up in threes.
Where is the sailor on the field? On deck!
It's deja vu all over again. -- Yogi Berra
Proposed rule change: 9 players, 8 uniforms!
It ain't over till it's over. -- Yogi Berra
How to get suspended by MLB: Corking yourself!
Manny Ramirez remains unsigned. And ungroomed!
We made too many wrong mistakes. -- Yogi Berra
Why do the Braves wear jockstraps? Totem poles!
Yogi Berra Quotes: It's deja-vu all over again.
Where is a marine on the baseball field? On base!
Why is the monster green?: Envy from Yankee wins!
Yogi Berra Quotes: 90% of the game is half mental.
Yogi Berra Quotes: It ain't over till it's over.
Yogi Berra Quotes: 90% of short putts don't go in.
Yogi Berra Quotes: We made too many wrong mistakes.
Baseball quotes: "Speed never goes into a slump."
Hey ump, It's against the law to make prank calls!
The future ain't what it used to be. -- Yogi Berra
What has 18 legs and catches flies? A baseball team!
Yogi Berra Quotes: Never answer an anonymous letter.
Baseball quotes: "There is no crying in baseball."
You can't hit what you can't see. -- Walter Johnson
I watch a lot of baseball on the radio. - Gerald Ford
What runs around the field but never wins? The fence!
You can observe a lot by just watching. -- Yogi Berra
What team does Pee-Wee Herman always watch? The Expos!
Where does a catcher sit for dinner? Behind the plate!
Yogi Berra Quotes: This is like deja vu all over again.
Baseball quotes: "Chin music is not a relaxing tune."
Who's the most famous Los Angeles Dodger? O.J. Simpson!
What do you call a baseball with bugs on it? A fly ball!
Baseball quotes: "You can't hit what you can't see."
Yogi Berra Quotes: The future ain't what it used to be.
Yogi Berra Quotes: A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore.
Yogi Berra Quotes: I didn't say half the things I said.
What baseball team does Pee Wee Herman like? The Yankees!
People practice what they're already good at --Pete Rose
Yogi Berra Quotes: You can observe a lot just by watchin!
Baseball is better than sex because pop ups are frequent.!
Yogi Berra Quotes: You can observe a lot just by watching.
How do you brainwash a Rockies fan? Piss in his underwear!
When you come to a fork in the road, take it. -- Yogi Berra
Yogi Berra Quotes: We're lost, but we're making great time!
Did you know that Tony Fernandez is Spanish for Bill Buckner?
What are the best kind of shoes for stealing bases? Sneakers!
Why did the baseball player go into the cave? To get his bat!
Hey ump, diarrhea has more consistency than your strike zone!
No wonder nobody comes here; it's too crowded. -- Yogi Berra
Baseball quotes: "See the ball - hit the ball." -- Pete Rose
What does C.U.B.S. stand for? Completely Useless By September!
Yogi Berra Quotes: If you can't imitate him, don't copy him.
Yogi Berra Quotes: How can you hit and think at the same time?
What does your average Red Sox fan get on an I.Q. test? Drool!
Yogi Berra Quotes: If you come to a fork in the road, take it.
Yogi Berra Quotes: If the world were perfect, it wouldn't be.
Religion as Baseball: Calvinists believe the game is fixed. Lutherans believe they can't win, but trust the Scorekeeper. Quakers won't swing. Unitarians can catch anything. Amish walk a lot. Pagans sacrifice. Jehovah's Witnesses are thrown out often. Televangelists get caught stealing. Episcopalians pass the plate. Evangelicals make effective pitches. Fundamentalists balk. Adventists have a seventh-inning stretch. Atheists refuse to have an Umpire. Baptists want to play hardball. Premillenialists expect the game to be called soon on account of darkness. The Pope claims never to have committed an error.

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